Heart of Gold

For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of. Matthew 12:34

Let me start by encouraging everyone who feels stuck in their faith or distant from God--PICK UP YOUR BIBLE. I promise, on everything, you will feel this weight fall off your shoulders. My Bible had sat on my desk all semester long with an occasional glance in it here and there, but since I have made it part of my daily routine to read it, life has been substantially brighter. Not only has it been insightful, but I feel God's presence and guidance; almost as if He is saying, "Finally, she is Home".

I have been a practicing Catholic my entire life. Have I been perfect? Not even remotely close, but thankfully, He keeps welcoming me back with open arms. The Bible is an intimidating aspect of Christianity, not one I felt comfortable exploring. I knew Bible scriptures and verses, certain parables, and stories from attending a Catholic school for most of my education, but other than that, the Bible was new territory to me. At the beginning of this academic school year, I began reading Matthew but fell off shortly after. Recently, trial and tribulation appeared in my life and instead of ranting to friends or family, I decided to pick up my Bible off the desk and give it another go, and let me tell you...life-changing. In just the Book of Matthew, so many new perspectives and emotions flooded over me. I felt no need to complain to my community or be upset over the obstacle that was thrown in my direction. Simply, reading Matthew managed to solve all my earthly issues and give all my concerns to God.

The biggest takeaway I got from this Gospel was to make your heart the most beautiful thing about you. The past week as I studied Matthew, I could not stop thinking about this wisdom God planted into me. He knew I needed to be reminded of this. I can get caught up with the unfair aspects of this world and hyper-fixate on things I cannot control. By doing so, I fail to show my community positivity or even a smile here and there. Most importantly, I fail to remain close to my faith. As hard as I try to keep a clear, happy-go-lucky mindset, as soon as a problem surfaces, I fall into a rut of "life is so hard," and blah blah blah. No--one bad thing happened in a life full of blessings.

What goes into someone's mouth does not defile them, but what comes out of their mouth, that is what defiles them. Matthew 15:11

In Matthew 15, the Pharisees were concerned with food entering the body by unwashed hands. Jesus rebuked their superstition and explained that one cannot be unclean by material objects. It is not what enters the body that makes one tainted, but what leaves the body instead. Your words mean more than you believe. Whether that implies with your friendships, relationships, or even to yourself--your focus needs to be less on material/physical aspects, and more on how you present your heart to others.

The more you practice positivity and being a light, the more enjoyable you are to yourself and your community. It is exhausting to complain and be pessimistic all the time, and rightfully so. For the last two weeks, it seems like, I could not shake this off-putting feeling; I was always on edge about something. I was like a ticking bomb; the smallest problem that occurred would determine my entire day. Was I content with being down in the dumps? No. If anything, I grew more upset because I was feeling so low and did not know how to make myself feel better. It was like this cycle. Want to know what got me out of this bothersome routine? Reading the Bible. All the stress I had from the past month vanished.

Let me paint the picture: I was sitting on a blanket at a local park in my college town. The weather was on the uprise; the sun was shining, people were walking their dogs, and so many boats were on the water. That day, I felt a sudden urge to do a Bible study. As I previously stated, I had no knowledge of the "proper" way to study it, so I invited a good friend of mine to come with me to ease the nerves. Right before I left for the park, my friend messaged me, saying he was unable to come. It was such a beautiful day, though, so I got into the car and decided to still follow through with my plan. I found a secluded area and laid out my blanket. I put on some worship music and began the Book of Matthew. Instantly, I felt a wave of contentment. All my problems were nonexistent. I am not exaggerating when I say that I have never felt more at peace. For the rest of the day, my mood was lifted and I was able to spread love to my peers. For each day that followed, I read my Bible. Long story short, after two weeks of what felt like constant trial and tribulation, the week that I prioritized God and my relationship with Him, was the most refreshing and unbothered seven days. As much as I would have enjoyed the company of my friend, God knew I needed to spend time alone with Him. I needed to cut out distractions and focus on my relationship with Him, and only Him. If you were to take anything from this entry, open a Bible and begin with the four Gospels. All your worries will be placed onto God, and you will feel at peace.

For it will not be you speaking, but the spirit of your Father speaking through you. Matthew 10:20

As I begin the Book of Mark, I will keep in mind the new perspectives and guidance Matthew brought: to make my heart the most beautiful thing, to spread positivity and light to my community, and to use my words as a tool, not a weapon. God uses each one of us to spread His word. He speaks through us if we give Him the opportunity.

To have a heart of gold is far better than having material objects. To put it into perspective, I remember more of how someone treats me rather than how they look. It is important to spread kindness and love to those around you, whether they are in your close circle or not. This world will have suffering and millions of trials and tribulations, but to walk through them with a pure heart is stronger than letting the situations walk over you.